Honestly.....

[mr.shoes]

.... you go bush for three years in the charming company of Terry Nutkins, and what happens to the board? Did Terry really sacrifice a pair of his finest fingers to the otter, Edal, for so little?

Sure, Tom Middleton's now become a travelling acrobat with a penchant for lurking behind the elephant enclosure after hours...... Mark Pritchard's Elephant Dub was a cheeky homage to Mr Middleton's big top bestiality.

And Mr Pritchard's ill-advised career move into presenting Springwatch, heartlessly making Bill Oddie redundant, still leaves a sour taste in the mouth.

If you're interested, Pritchard, Oddie's now forced to eek out a humble living playing harmonica solos on Cash In The Attic!!!!

Yes, our musical heroes have succumbed to the bright lights of the circus and BBC wildlife programmes, but we have no reason to fall from the moral high ground and descend into silence!

[mr.shoes]

I stopped listening to Mr Middleton when he started sporting a white flat cap, obviously flattering himself to be the Northern Pope, spinning the Vatican platters that matter while tending to his whippets and gambling on ferret races.

I cut Mr Pritchard a little more slack, but his recent Britain's Got Talent audition, dressed as Barry The Cross-Eyed Baboon, playing a dodgy cover of The Goodies' Funky Gibbon, proved the final straw.

BEWARE FALSE IDOLS!

.... and Billy Idol, because frankly, he's a twat.

Love to all the regulars. Hope you're fine and dandy.

Mr Shoes

xx

@bernielentils on Twitter

[Steve Sole]

What the feck ell are you on about?
I think I know your angle, but its your language man...

Anyway, first time for me on here for honks. Nothing's changed much!
Hope you're all well too, and mr. Shoes, I loved this post. X